


How To Make Friends: A Short Guide By Keith Kogane

by Ella (ellabellachicketychella)



Series: why do the stars shine so bright [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Canon, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Claustrophobia, Fluff, Foster Kid Keith (Voltron), Friendship, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Keith & Shiro (Voltron) are Adoptive Siblings, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Keith (Voltron)-centric, Keith Straight Up Does Not Have A Good Time, M/M, Panic Attacks, Pre-Relationship, Swearing, Team Bonding, they're all messes tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:49:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27118456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellabellachicketychella/pseuds/Ella
Summary: The thing was that Keith couldn’t make friends. It was just something Keith came to accept a long time ago, probably when he was five and his father died. Shiro was probably his first friend since his father and then Adam. Now he was stuck on a spaceship with six other people and was trying to avoid speaking to most of them unless he had to.That changed, when a certain Pidge "Pidgeon" Holt decides she's had enough of Keith being an emo and trying to keep himself away from the rest of them. And forces (or bullies, depends who you ask) him to play a video game. Which was the start of life long friendships. Also known as, how Keith learnt to trust again.---“You weren’t asleep like how I’m not awesome,” Lance said, sticking out his chest a little and looking like a poor imitation of a rooster.“What? Both are true.”“No,” Lance’s face dropped. “Both aren’t true even if you keep denying both.”
Relationships: Allura & Coran & Hunk & Keith & Lance & Pidge | Katie Holt & Shiro, Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Series: why do the stars shine so bright [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979423
Comments: 15
Kudos: 182





	How To Make Friends: A Short Guide By Keith Kogane

**Author's Note:**

> Content Warnings and Trigger Warning!
> 
> Keith got abused as a child, so that's mentioned and he has nightmares. He also has a panic attack, while it's not said explicitly that it's a panic attack, it basically is a panic attack. So please be careful and be safe and enjoy!

The thing was that Keith couldn’t make friends. It was just something Keith came to accept a long time ago, probably when he was five and his father died. Shiro was probably his first friend since his father and then Adam.

Now he was stuck on a spaceship with six other people and was trying to avoid speaking to most of them unless he had to. Apart from Hunk, Keith liked Hunk and didn’t want to get close enough to the others to find out if he did like them or not.

Lance fought with him, which was easier to do. Keep him away with insults which were a bit too close to home. Pidge was a giant nerd and Keith didn’t know the first thing about technology so he had that going for him.

But she was stubborn.

“Hey, Keith, Keith, Keith!” Keith ignored the urge to groan and turned around to face Keith. “I have a video game, and Lance and Hunk are busy doing whatever. Shiro’s probably… like meditating and Coran and Allura are… well, no thanks.”

“Pidge…”

“Keith.”

“I don’t want to.”

“I don’t care,” Pidge responded, latching onto Keith’s wrist. “Please, I ask nothing of you! Not even a tiny bit, I don’t yell at you when you’re being moody and I don’t yell at you when the sexual tension between you and Lance gets so high I think I’m going to be traumatised forever.”

“The what? Aren’t you twelve?”

“I’m fourteen, what the fuck?” Pidge muttered, turning a corner and the door opened as they walked in. 

Sure enough on the dingy TV looking thing that was in the corner of this room was what looked like a dump. There were crates and empty food packets and blankets thrown in this room. While the only thing lighting it up was the blue light of the TV. 

“Welcome to the cave,” Pidge said, extending her arms either side of her as if she was showing off something a lot greater than this. “Here is where Hunk, Lance and I spend any time we have wasting our lives away in front of this junk.”

They’ve been in space for nearly two months. Maybe? And Keith hasn’t spoken to Hunk or Pidge when there hasn’t been a group around. Keith would be embarrassed if he could find it within himself to care.

“Uh…” Keith said, clearly using the big brain that made him a prodigy at flying and in general at The Garrison. “Cool? What am I doing?”

“This was our super-secret plan to befriend you,” Pidge said proudly, crossing her arms before essentially throwing Keith onto a blanket and holding him a controller. “We get you addicted to video games then you come back.”

Keith raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think that’s going to work.”

Pidge just gave a knowing smile. “So basically, you have to shoot the alien things. There are power-ups and stuff. It’s quite easy to get the hang of.”

“I’m not going to get addicted to the game,” Keith said laughing, he decided to play just for fun. Because Pidge didn’t drag him the entire way here for Keith to just leave. “I’ll just play once.”

* * *

It was about three in the morning. Everyone else was asleep and Keith was glaring at the TV trying to beat Lance’s high score because he could and if he couldn’t sleep he was going to try and do something productive.

_This isn’t productive Keith._ His mind supplied him, in a reasoning voice which sounded a bit too much like Adam. _Do something productive._

The monkey side of his brain, which sounded like Shiro gave a valid reason that Keith couldn’t argue with. _No._ So Keith was left spamming the button trying to beat this damn high score because he had nothing better to do.

_Train._

He got a powerup and started shooting at twice the speed.

_Train!_

“Fine!” Keith muttered, putting the controller down. “I’ll train, stupid brain.” He turned off the TV and stood up, cracking his back by leaning back a bit too far before craning his neck as it made popping noises. 

He walked down the hall, bayard in his hand as the sword extended out of it, “Level three.” He muttered as he stepped into the training room. Did this place have an actual name? Or was it just the training room?

“Starting level three sequence,” the robotic voice responded and Keith held his sword in front of him. Watching the gladiators rise out of the ground as he sighed. Giving himself a moment before the gladiators lunged.

There were three of them, Keith deflected a lunge and in turn, swiped back. Getting blocked as another sword was swiped at his head, which made Keith jump back and almost land on the ground.

More metal clashed and Keith finally got one and it disintegrated into pixels. Leaving two more who were swinging for revenge, he darted backwards, ducking under a sword out of instinct more than anything else.

The back and forth lasted longer than Keith would’ve liked to admit. With him ducking and weaving out of the way of particularly dangerous swipes before swinging and getting blocked. If Shiro had seen the way he was fighting he’d surely lock the door and not allow Keith out until he’d beaten this in a minute maybe.

A sword got too close, “End training sequence!” He yelled as the gladiators turned into pixels. He stayed on the floor a bit longer, breathing heavily looking up at the roof as his chest heaved up and down.

Water. That was a great idea. Water. He peeled himself off of the floor and started trudging down another hallway, before ending up in the kitchen. Water. Water pouch, where would they be?

He looked in the cupboard and found one, pulling it out and then sticking a straw into it. The water was still and somehow tasted old, which Keith didn’t know was something water could do. 

When he emptied that in three seconds he tossed it in the rubbish chute and then sat on the kitchen table. Before lying down on it, just for a moment, a split second, then realising that was a bad idea and clambering into a seat.

Curling up in it he looked out of the window, watching the endless stars just drift by. He didn’t even notice when he fell asleep.

That was until someone loudly said, “Is Keith asleep?” In a disbelieving voice, Keith woke up. Jumping and hands-on his bayard, which he let go when it was just Hunk and Lance.

“No,” Keith rubbed his eyes, which wasn’t helping his look here. 

“You weren’t asleep like how I’m not awesome,” Lance said, sticking out his chest a little and looking like a poor imitation of a rooster. 

“What? Both are true.”

“No,” Lance’s face dropped. “Both aren’t true even if you keep denying both.”

“You’re not making sense,” Keith replied. Standing up. “I was not asleep.”

“Do you even sleep?” Hunk asked and was met with a glare from both of them. “I mean after missions and stuff everyone else conks out on the couch and you… where do you even go?”

“Training deck.” Lance filled in the blank and Keith just looked at him, “What? I know where my teammates go, I’m not stupid.”

“Well.”

“Keithy!” Lance held a hand to his chest like Keith had just punched him or stabbed him. “How dare you, you implied that I’m stupid? How shall I ever cope!”

“It’s too early for this,” Keith pushed his chair back and stood up. “It’s always too early for this.”

“You love me, Keith, you’re just in denial.”

“I love you the same way I love to sleep.”

“Endlessly?”

“I hate sleeping,” Keith responded and this time Lance looked a bit offended. Now Keith was off to find the weird space-coffee and inject it into his veins.

It was quiet after that as Keith stumbled into the kinda-kitchen and put the weird brown sludge in the cup. The sludge wasn’t good or anything it made Keith kind of sad to drink. But he needed to stay awake.

After proceeding to guzzle the coffee and then feel a million times better Keith managed to make it back out into the living area where Pidge was swearing like she was a sailor. “You!” She accused.

Walking over before poking him in the chest, “You ruined my high score!” 

“I did?”

“You bet everyone’s!”

“Even Lance?”

“Lance is part of everyone, is he not?” Pidge yelled before swatting at Keith the same way Keith would swat at flies. “You are my least favourite, you’ve been playing the game for what? A day? And you beat us all.”

Lance made a noise from the couch and everyone turned to him. “Keith has to be the best at everything he does. Overshadow everyone in the areas they think they’re good at.”

“Uh… I didn’t mean to?” Keith said, while not very convincing was the truth. Pidge just looked between him and Lance and then she facepalmed. “I’m going to, go and… do something.”

When Keith started walking away he heard behind him, but not directed at him. “I have never met someone that awkward.” Which was what Pidge said and Hunk and Lance had laughed and Keith didn’t know how he was supposed to feel about it.

\---

Keith avoided playing the video game after that, if Lance got that bitter over Keith getting a high score then he can have the high score. Keith just doesn’t want to fight anymore, not over things like that.

Part of him is tired of fighting, for Voltron, for himself. He’s just so tired. Another part of him knows that it’s the only thing he knows. And running.

Fighting and running. Fantastic. He couldn't run because he’s on a spaceship and would die if he tried. But he can fight the gladiator things.

He was up to level five now.

When the last gladiator turned into pixels there were flat, unenthusiastic claps directed at him. Which made Keith spin around to see Lance. Leaning against the archway, arms crossed, his bayard dangling from his hand. 

“What are you doing?” Keith asked, his bayard shrinking from his sword into what it was normally like. “You should be sleeping.”

“ _I_ should be sleeping. Buddy, _you_ should be sleeping. I’m only awake to check on you.” 

“Huh?” He walked back over to the bag that Keith kept in here. Starting to unwrap the bandages around his knuckles. “I’m fine.”

“Keith, you’re not sleeping. Shiro is about three seconds away from actually sedating you, I’m trying to save you from that.”

“I’m good Lance. I’ve done more on less sleep.”

“Well, I’m sure Shiro either wasn’t there or didn’t approve. You’re going to bed, or when we get back home I’m telling Mama and she’ll force you to sleep for seven years.”

He almost wanted to laugh at the “when” because it was a when situation for everyone else, for Keith it was an “if” a slight possibility that he got back to Earth. Even if he did get back to Earth alive, he didn’t exactly have many places to go. Considering Adam told Shiro that if he left Adam wouldn’t be there if he came back…

Yeah, no. Keith won’t have anywhere to go if he gets back to Earth. Which would almost be sad if Keith wasn’t so used to not having anyone.

“Keith, buddy?” Lance was approaching him and Keith zipped up the bag, which managed to somehow both silence him and shut him down so Lance couldn’t say anymore. A normal person wouldn’t have said anything else. Not while Keith was so snappy and pissed.

Lance wasn't normal. “You need to sleep. We hate seeing you like this Keith.”

“Like what?” He snapped, looking up from his bag. “Myself?”

He smiled and shook his head, and the smile was so kind Keith wanted to shake Lance so hard that he stopped smiling. “Nah, it’s not. Keith, go to bed.”

“What are you, Shiro?”

“I’ll get him,” Lance deadpanned and Keith’s eyes shot wide. “I will and you know I will.”

“Fine!” Keith threw his hands up in the air. “I’ll go to sleep. Thanks, asshole.”

“Anytime, dipshit.”

Which was the end of that.

* * *

Hunk was trying to make something out of food goo. Which involved alien spices and colouring as he hummed and danced around the kitchen. As Keith sat on the floor, up against the wall. Reading.

He couldn’t speak Altean or even read it. But the amazing thing about space helmets was they could translate things for you. So Keith was sitting on the floor, his helmet on, looking at a book.

Sure, it looked dorky but also, there was nothing else better to do on this damn ship. There were footsteps that Keith knew belonged to Lance as the door flung open. 

“You can read?” Were the first words to come out of Lance’s mouth and Keith looked up from his book. “I thought Shiro was joking.”

“I did go to school. I was also top of my class.”

“You’re also a dropout. Why are you here?”

“It was quiet. I’d rather not hear Pidge swearing and Shiro telling her off and then Allura and Coran asking what fuck means.” Keith looked back down at his book. 

Lance left pretty soon after that and Keith immersed himself in the book. Sure he couldn’t even wrap his head around how to pronounce half of the names, but he was enjoying himself. With Hunk’s slightly out of tune singing to songs that Keith can recognise but he didn’t know where from.

“Oh no.” Hunk muttered and Keith looked up, his hand hovering over his bayard which was nearby. “I burnt it!” Keith took his helmet off and put it on the floor next to his closed book.

“What did you do?” Keith asked.

“I burnt it!” Hunk gestured to a pot, in which the food goo had been separated. So there was food in this pot and goo in the other pot. But the food part was burnt.

“Do we have a potato or something like it?”

“Huh?”

“To suck out the burnt taste,” Keith said, glancing at Hunk. “Y’know, you do it when something’s too salty. Potatoes, God’s vegetable.”

Hunk just continued to look at him, still slightly confused. 

“Or cut off the burnt bits? Then add the potato, that’ll work better.” Keith gave Hunk and small smile and Hunk proceeded to pick him up and hug him.

Keith was surprised when he didn’t flinch away, or try and get out of the hug. He just let it happened, relaxing almost completely as Hunk hugged him like Keith had saved his firstborn child or something. When Keith was put back on the floor Hunk was grinning.

“You, Keith Kogane are a genius! Why did I forget about the potato trick? Wait,” Hunk looked at Keith, eyes scanning. “You can cook?”

“Yeah?” Keith said slowly, unsure if that’s the right answer. He survived a year out in a shack by himself, yes he could cook. He got pretty good at it too. “Well, yeah, no. I can cook.”

“You are the perfect human!” Hunk said excitedly, “You can cook, you can fight, you are good at literally everything you do.”

Keith started laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe at that moment. Because anyone calling any aspect of Keith perfect was too funny. He was hot-headed and impulsive and would rather die than tell anyone what he was thinking. Something about that just made Keith lose it.

Maybe being trapped in space for maybe three months would do that to you, so Keith just laughed so hard he had to double over and clutch his stomach because it hurt so much. “Ow!” Keith said between laughs.

There were frantic footsteps and Shiro was in the doorway, Lance peeking over his shoulder. “Keith are you okay? What happened? Is he hurt?”

“Is he… laughing?” Lance said, ducking under Shiro’s arm and letting his mouth fall open. “He’s laughing! He can do that?” 

Shiro nodded as Keith looked up from being doubled over, tears in his eyes. “He is a human, he does human things.”

Keith laughed harder, doubling over even more. Like this was the best comedy bit that had ever happened and in his head it was.

“Okay Keith, you’re scaring me now,” Shiro prodded him in the leg with his foot. “Are you a body double, where’s my Keith?”

Last time Keith laughed this hard he was probably four and being tickled. He eventually managed to stand upright and looked at Lance before proceeding to lose it again and laughed even hard somehow until he was wheezing for breath.

“What is happening?” Allura, being ever so worried. “Why can’t he breathe?”

“I’m…” wheeze, “Right,” another wheeze. “Here!” 

Shiro must’ve turned to Allura. “It’s a human reaction, sometimes people are either so happy or so crazy that they laugh like this. Hunk what did you say? You’ve broken him.”

“I called him a perfect human!” Hunk put his hands up in the air and Shiro managed to keep a straight face for about a nanosecond.

“Keith?” Shiro laughed, before doubling over like Keith as they both laughed.

“They’ve gone crazy,” Lance said, and maybe they had. 

But Hell, Keith hadn’t laughed this hard in years and as soon as he started laughing he couldn’t stop.

Eventually the rest of the team (minus Pidge) started ignoring them. “Hey Allura, do you have potatoes?”

“What’s a potato?”

Then Lance went into describing what exactly a potato was and what it’s function was. 

Keith and Shiro were still laughing.

* * *

“This is why we can’t have nice things,” Shiro sighed. Looking at the smashed plate on the floor. “Okay. I’m not mad.”

“Oh he’s mad, mad,” Keith muttered and Lance must’ve heard him because he snorted. Very attractively too. 

“I’m not mad, who smashed it?”

“Keith!” Pidge said, pointing the first finger and Keith felt so offended that he forgot how to speak for a moment.

“What? I’ve been on the training deck!” Keith had finally found out the name, it was a deck, which didn’t make a lot of sense but who was Keith to name rooms in the castle? “I also don’t eat off plates, I eat outta bowls. You accused me quickly, it was you!”

“Was not! I’d fess up!” Pidge argued before looking at Lance. “Lance, however, wouldn’t fess up, because he wouldn’t want to get yelled at by one of his childhood heroes.”

“What?” Lance squawked, “Are you calling me a liar Pigeon Holt? How clumsy do you think I am? Hunk, why have you been so quiet?” He turned to look at Hunk who quickly put his hands up in the air, in a surrender.

Hunk shook his head, “I am not getting involved. I was in the cave, the game is paused, right now. Wasn’t me.”

Keith looked at Shiro, who was forcing his face to be straight. Keith knew the look and watched as Shiro’s body shook with laughter and yet he kept his face straight and didn’t make a single noise. When Keith groaned everyone looked at him, waiting for some reasoning.

Shiro’s eyes went wide for a second and Keith just rolled his eyes. “It was Shiro.”

“What?” Lance said, apparently having taken this as a personal attack. “You accused us! How long would you let us argue about this?”

“Hours.” Keith deadpanned. “He did the same with me and his fiancé, he didn’t fill up the water dispenser and blamed us. We argued it out for like a week.”

“Fiancée?” Pidge yelled, looking at Shiro. “You were engaged!”

“Still technically is,” Keith added, further adding to Pidge losing her shit.

She was squawking and rambling so much that Keith couldn’t make out a single word she was saying, all he could hear was noises as Pidge flapped her arms like she was an actual Pidgeon. Maybe this was where she got the nickname? All the flapping.

Lance was just smiling, knowingly. He looked at Keith. “Adam Wright?” He mouthed and Keith nodded once. Before Lance erupted into a smile, as it looked like he was piecing together the puzzle.

Shiro eventually calmed Pidge down who looked tired. “Okay space children, bedtime.”

“Whatever you say, Dad,” Pidge teased and Shiro responded by ruffling her hair an impossible amount. Just like what Shiro would do to Keith when he was being particularly difficult.

Shiro turned around, looking at Keith and Lance. “Don’t stay up too late.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it Dad,” Lance shot back and Shiro rolled his eyes at them. When Hunk, Pidge and Shiro had left Lance turned to Keith, basically bouncing on his feet. “So him and Commander Wright?”

Commander Wright— Adam, the proper title. “Yeah…” Keith trailed off. “Technically they’re still engaged.”

“Did Adam like, date anyone else?”

“Not while I was there,” Keith crossed his arms. “I feel like Shiro and Adam were just, each other’s people… soulmates, except souls don’t exist. Those people who were just, there. That’s how Shiro would explain it anyway.”

“Elaborate?” Lance asked and Keith closed his eyes, trying to remember word-for-word what Shiro had told them the day they got engaged.

“Someone where you’re both the best and worst version of yourself. Someone who even if you hadn’t seen them in years would still hold you if you cried. That person is your person,” Keith smiled at the next bit. “Then Shiro told me if I met that person to hold on tight and never let go.”

He glanced at Lance who looked back. “M—me?”

“What?”

“You looked at me!” Lance argued, and Keith would bet anything he owned that Lance was turning red. “After you said that!”

“I looked at you because you’re the only other person here?” Keith gestured to the empty room around him. “I’m not in love with you Lance, don’t worry.”

“Oh, thank God.”

Keith laughed. “I have standards, McClain.”

“So do I, mullet.”

“Let me guess, your standards are anything female looking that breathes?”

“Yup. Wait no, anything that breathes _apart_ from you!”

Keith threw his head back and laughed.

* * *

Sometimes Keith let himself look back and wonder. How the everloving fuck did he get into this situation? This situation was getting his hair braided by a space-ninja-princess who was over ten thousand years old who was magic.

Normal day. This was a normal day.

With a space-ninja-magic-princess braiding his hair.

Normal!

“Are you alright Keith?”

“Yep,” Keith sat still, crossing his legs underneath him. “Good, fine, great even.”

“This doesn’t seem to be like you, are you sure you’re alright?”

“I’m good.”

“The last mission was quite frightening. You’re allowed to be shaken up about it,” Allura added, finally starting the braid and Keith laughed, trying not to move as much as possible. 

The last mission. It hadn’t gone great for Keith, it went well for everyone else. They all came out without a scratch, but Keith had dived in front of Pidge as a sword swung down at her. It hit him in the back and he started bleeding like crazy.

He doesn’t quite remember exactly what happened, more fuzzy recollections. Lance and Shiro yelling at him, Hunk and Pidge went too quiet and Allura and Coran over the comms asking them what was wrong.

According to Pidge, he’d been in the pod for an entire day. When he eventually got out everyone was there, and silent, just looking at him. Keith had run off and Allura, surprising enough, had come after him.

Keith let out a short, almost forced laugh, “I’m really fine.”

“They were worried. We were worried,” Allura corrected, still working on the braid, her fingers darting through Keith’s hair to make what had to be an elaborate braid. “You worry us. Hunk will fret about whether you’ve been eating, Pidge will worry if you’ve gotten enough breaks and Shiro…”

“He worries about everything,” Keith finished and Allura laughed. It was light and if Keith closed his eyes he could imagine that he was back on Earth with one of the kids from the homes as they braided his hair.

But, again. Space princess. Nothing about this was normal, not even a little bit.

“Do you mean to make them worried?”

“No. Sometimes I just forget I have people who care,” Keith said quietly. Letting the weight of his words fill the room. Why he was telling Allura everything he didn’t know. “It’s very easy to talk to you, you’d be a great therapist.”

“Therapist?”

“Oh, uh, it’s like… a brain doctor? They help sort through your issues,” Keith finished. Back on Earth when he was with Adam and Shiro he had a therapist, the therapist wasn’t a very good one at all. Allura would’ve been better.

“Oh,” Allura said, softly, like a whisper. “Thank you, Keith, your words mean a lot.”

Allura said his name differently, more like Keef rather than Keith, which notably was how Lance said his name when he was distressed or Keith was in trouble. Like that mission.

_“Keith! Stay with us dipshit!”_

Keith blinked a few times, rubbing his eyes, so he was getting some memory back from the mission then. Great, fantastic even, he groaned and Allura paused on his hair.

“Are you alright Keith?”

“Just, remembering stuff on the mission. Lance screaming.”

“Ah,” Allura said, with a hint of amusement in her voice and Keith couldn’t place why, “Yes, he was rather worried about you. I’m pretty sure he hurt his throat from the amount of yelling he was doing.”

_“If you die on me Kogane I am going to kick your sorry little ass into next week.”_

Keith couldn’t help but crack a smile at that one. Allura finished the braid soon after, tying it with an elastic, which led to the question where did you get an elastic in space? Probably at the space mall.

“We care about you Keith,” Allura said softly, “While they may not be happy with you, a hit like that would’ve probably killed Pidge or done serious damage that the pod may not have been able to fix.”

“See! It was the right move.”

“Yes, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that you got severely injured.” Allura moved around him, so she was sitting in front of Keith a soft, kind, almost motherly smile on her lips. “We care about you.”

“I know,” Keith’s hands went around to his hair and felt around the braid. It felt intricate, but considering he couldn’t see it he had no way of telling. “I just… forget sometimes, that there are people who care about me.”

“Why’s that?” Allura asked, and there was no teasing, no cruelty, just curiosity on her face. He didn’t have to answer it, he knew that. But he wanted to, there was no pressure here and that was nice.

“I didn’t have many people caring about me for a long time. I just forget sometimes, but I’m getting better.”

“That’s all we can ask for Keith,” Allura stood up, “I think it’s time to talk to the team, I know they’ve been worried about you.”

Keith stood up too. Walking out with Allura before getting a group hug so smothering Keith forgot that he needed to breathe in these situations.

But the hug was nice. 

What was even nicer was finally realising, that these people cared about him just as much as he cared about them. That was comforting, like sitting in front of a fireplace or a warm drink. 

For the first time in what must have been years Keith let himself feel safe.

* * *

“Hey, Keith. Why did you get kicked out of The Garrison?” Hunk asked, one early morning.

Shiro proceeded to spit his coffee out across the table before looking at Keith, accusing eyes. “You did what?” 

Keith facepalmed. The plan was that Shiro never found out about that until they got back to Earth and even then the plan was for Keith to avoid the topic for as long as possible. But Hunk threw that all out of the window. 

Thank you, Hunk.

“I know!” Lance said, raising his hand and all Keith could think was that he looked like a three-year-old. Keith glared at Lance who put his hand down. “Nevermind, no clue, it’s honestly a mystery.”

Shiro stood up, “You got kicked out?”

Keith raised his hands in defence, trying to get an argument together before Shiro decapitated him. “Technically I dropped out.”

“The police were gonna get involved if he didn’t though,” Lance added and that was met with Keith’s glare. 

“The police were gonna do what now?” Shiro screeched, “Fucking, Hell, Keith… what the everloving fuck did you do?”

Ah. Here’s where his argument fell apart quicker than his mental health. “So Shiro… Iverson may have been insulting you and yelling at you. So if I threw the closest item to me at him would you blame me?”

“No.”

“What if that item was a knife?” Keith asked, “And now Iverson can only use one eye.”

Shiro’s face stayed too blank, and Keith couldn’t help but get ready to be hit. This was how his foster’s would look at him before he got hit and Keith was waiting for a hit that deep down he knew would never come.

“Let me get this straight,” Shiro started and both of them snickered. “You threw a knife at Iverson, and now he can only use one eye.”

“Yeah.”

“Then you got kicked out. What did Adam do?”

Oh. Oh dear God. Keith was going to have to explain the whole, he left for the desert because Adam legally had no power to adopt him.

“So when you went missing I was put into the care of The Garrison. So when I got kicked out social services came for me.”

“But Adam?”

“Had no legal grounds. Also, he didn’t have a place of residence and you need one of those to adopt a child. When Yua and Eiji died, you had legal grounds because you were my brother… Adam technically had no relation to me.”

There was a long silence, as the weight of what Keith said set for Shiro. “You went back into care!” He yelled and Keith shook his head, watching Shiro’s face screw up in confusion.

“I left.”

“What?” Several voices yelled at him, Shiro was the loudest. But Lance was pretty loud too. Shiro took a deep breath. “You… left. What about Adam?”

“He let me, we talked before I did. We both knew he didn’t have any legal ground over me.”

“Everyone else out,” Shiro snapped, eyes still on Keith. “Private family matters.”

Despite the logic, Keith’s instincts were screaming that he was going to get hit. Which while he knew made no sense, Shiro would die before he hit Keith. It was still a gut feeling and Keith took a deep breath.

Everyone else left.

“Why couldn’t Adam adopt you?” Shiro said, his voice had gone quiet now. 

“You weren’t married,” Keith said softly, “The law didn’t see Adam as related to me… in your will, there was nothing about Adam getting custody over me. So I went into The Garrison’s care.”

Shiro stared at him. “Then you weren’t and social services came for you.” Shiro finished quietly. “So you ran.”

“So I ran.”

“Did Adam at least know where you were?”

“Yeah.”

“Why didn’t he adopt you when I died, rather than waiting until he had to.”

Keith looked down at his hands, “He didn’t want to.”

“What?”

“I think… I think it was because he... hadn’t recovered. He would in a heartbeat, but I reminded him too much of you and that hurt. So he didn’t try until we both knew that it was too late.”

Shiro sighed, “How long, were you out on your own?”

“A year.”

“A year? Keith…”

“I know.” He crossed his arms and Shiro just looked so incredibly sad. “Yeah… it was a long time. But, I’m out here now, I couldn’t be alone even if I tried.”

Shiro just smiled, a mixture of sadness and happiness. Before he hugged Keith so hard that he almost squeezed the lungs out of Keith.

\---

Keith was sitting on the couch, reading his book. Still with his clunky helmet on as it translated. Hunk was playing a video game as Pidge yelled instructions at him. While Shiro sneakily napped on the couch.

Coran and Allura were… somewhere.

Lance rushed in, “Hunk! What’s the word?”

“Oh!” Hunk paused the game, “We’re doing this, okay go.”

“Allura was asking, ah, they’re big and water animals and they like a water cow? With scary teeth.”

Hunk’s face was incredibly blank.

“Don’t they have red sweat?”

“Hippo,” Keith said bluntly. “It’s a hippo.”

“That’s the bitch!” Lance snapped his fingers and smiled widely. “Hippo, duh.”

“On today's episode of Lance doesn’t know the name of things,” Pidge deadpanned, picking up the controller and crossing her legs underneath her. Somehow looking more and more like a gremlin.

Lance looked like Pidge had just murdered his firstborn. “Excuse me, you try knowing three languages! English is my second language, you gremlin.”

Pidge didn’t unpause the game, instead craning her neck around. “Wait, English isn’t your first language.”

“I’m Cuban? Why would English be my first language?”

“Fair,” Pidge turned back around, “Wait, Spanish, English and…”

“French.” Lance finished and Pidge nodded, before unpausing the game and continuing. As Hunk would wince every time she made a risky move, Lance threw himself on the couch next to Keith.

He peeked over Keith’s shoulder, basically laying on it to read. “What does it say?” Lance asked and Keith decided to ignore the fact that Lance was laying on his shoulder.

“‘The flowers were like the suns, bright and shining, and like the suns could power the world. However, it still wasn’t quite as bright as Fijik’s smile.”

“Who’s Fijik?” Lance asked.

“The friend of the protagonist. He’s kinda emo… I think Fijik’s a he? Does Atlea have the same gender constructs as humans?”

“Basically,” Lance waved a hand. “Who’s the protagonist?”

“God,” Keith muttered, squinting at the mess of letters that was the name. “Oparakanil?” He scanned ahead before staring at the words. “Oh my God, they’re gay for each other.”

“Huh?” Lance went, pushing into Keith’s shoulder more. “What happened? What happened? I am very invested in the gay space book, tell me, tell me. Right now or I’ll die.”

Keith cringed, “I can’t read this outloud.”

“Holy shit!” Lance pried the helmet off of Keith’s head and shoved it on his own, snatching the book out of Keith’s hands and then reading where Keith was reading. They stayed quiet for a long moment. “Wait they’re fucking in a flower field?”

“Apparently.”

Pidge snorted from her spot on the couch. “That can not be comfortable.”

Lance ripped off the helmet before throwing the book across the room. “No!” Keith yelled as it hit the ground before looking at Lance. “You asshole.”

“I’ll get the book,” Lance grumbled. Placing the helmet where he had been sitting and picking up the book, handing it to Keith who mumbled thanks. “A flower field, huh. That’s a weird spot.”

“What’s a weird spot?” Shiro mumbled.

“A flower field,” Pidge filled in. “No, fuck, shit, fuck, fuck!” Which was directed at the video game.

“Why’s a flower field a weird spot?” Shiro sat up, rubbing his eyes.

“In Keith’s book it’s where two guys screw,” Pidge finished and Shiro sat up a lot straighter. Looking directly at Keith.

“Allura gave me the book…” Keith trailed off. “What the hell was she implying?” Keith stood up and there were chuckles as he left.

Safe to say Allura ended up laughing so hard she cried.

* * *

Keith didn’t trust easily. It was just something about him which was as ingrained into him as disliking coffee but living off of it, or the need to fight when things got difficult, or how flinching away from people was just part of him now.

The team knew this too, they knew that Keith kept most of his cards so close to his chest they didn’t even know how many cards he has. Slowly, he was showing them some cards, while keeping others under the table.

It wasn’t huge, but it was progress. 

One thing Keith wouldn’t do, no matter what was sleep where people could see him. Not even if it was Shiro, because sleeping around people implies that you trust them enough to make sure they don’t hurt you while you’re sleeping.

Which was almost impossible for Keith to do. Yes, it was silly. He’d trust Lance to catch him after throwing himself off a cliff and he’d trust Shiro to have his back in a mission and he’d trust Hunk to not poison him.

But sleeping… was just something he couldn’t do. Not even when he lived with Adam and Shiro, the only time he’d fallen asleep in a public place was when he’d stayed up for two days straight before a test.

Then Adam had gently shaken him awake and Keith had trudged back to his room.

Yes, he trusts the team. He trusts all of them with his life and being and everything else. 

It was probably from too many times, being woken up before dragged away from his current foster-home or maybe it was being hit awake or screamed at until he woke up. Also, it was nightmares.

Everyone had nightmares, which was reasonable after what they’d been through. But, Keith was the only one who came to space with nightmares, nightmares that were as real as a grisly crime story. They were all real.

Maybe Pidge had nightmares about losing her family, but Keith had lost his family. Not to say Pidge’s nightmares didn’t matter, they did. But something about them being real didn’t sit right with Keith.

His nightmares were ugly and real and he’d wake up screaming and then pray that no one had heard him. Which was why he refused to sleep in front of the team, he refused to even think about nodding off at the movie nights. 

The team was fine with it, everyone had boundaries. Shiro had to eat with other people or it, “feels too similar…” then he’d trail off but everyone else knew what he meant. Pidge just didn’t mention her family and neither did anyone else.

They had their boundaries and Keith had his. And he was fine with it. Everyone was fine with it! 

Then after a mission, Keith stumbled into the living area. In his defence, he had three hours of sleep over four days and every single bone and muscle in his body ached to just go to sleep.

No one was in here at the moment and as someone who had passed out from exhaustion a fair bit, he knew that he’d pass out in the hallway if he tried to get to his bedroom. So instead he flopped onto the couch.

He fell asleep before he hit the couch.

Keith couldn’t remember the dream, only flashes. Which involved him being locked in a cupboard, as he slammed his fists against the door, trying to get out. But no one let him out. Apart from that, all he remembered was fear, true fear. Not the fun kind of fear like a roller coaster.

The type of fear that turned his guts inside out.

He sat up letting a cry come out of his mouth before slapping his hand over his mouth.

“Keith?” That was Lance.

Please no. If Keith opened his eyes right now he wouldn’t be on the couch. He’d be in his bed, where he slept, the only place he slept.

“Keith are you awake?” Hunk.

Instead of responding Keith threw the blanket off himself, when did that get there and held one arm in front of himself. In a fighting stance, almost. As he assessed the situation.

Pidge was in the bean bag. Allura and Hunk were sitting on the floor, while Coran, Shiro and Lance had taken various spots on the couch and Keith was ready to fight all of them. His heart was beating fast enough and he was breathing heavy enough.

Instead of someone tackling him or pulling out a knife he was met with kind eyes.

“Keith?” Allura started, her voice gentle.

“Don’t.” Keith snapped, his voice rough, maybe from the sleep or the fear or a mixture of both. His chest was still heaving and his eyes were still darting from person to person, waiting for someone to try something. “Aren’t you gonna do something?” Keith rasped.

Lance tilted his head ever-so-slightly. “Like?”

“I dunno, hit me or something,” Keith said slowly, the words tasted like blood in his mouth. Then everyone but Shiro looked horrified at that preposition and Shiro stood up and walked towards him and Keith flinched so hard he fell over the back of the couch.

Everyone stayed quiet for a few seconds. “Keith…” That was Shiro, “Are you alright?”

Keith made a noise which must have sounded pathetic. “I smashed my head against the floor,” he whined. He dragged himself back off the floor and his hand went to the back of his head. When he brought his hand back around there was blood. “Oh.” He looked at Shiro who sighed.

“Keith.”

“I’m good, I’m fine. I’m going to bed,” Keith rubbed the back of his head, wincing slightly. Everyone else exchanged glances like they weren’t quite sure how to approach whatever needed to happen next.

Keith waited and Lance took a deep breath, “Look, Keith. You don’t have to tell us anything, nothing at all. But if you want to, we’re here.”

And Keith could’ve told them everything, just start talking and never stop. Tell them about being left and the foster-homes and how Shiro probably saved him from being just another statistic. But, it’s Keith, and he doesn’t. He just nods gratefully.

They’re not dumb, they’ve probably figured it out already. About whatever abuse happened to him, they already probably knew anyway. It’s not like Keith is subtle, he flinches when people try to give him high-fives and when someone he doesn’t trust touches him he freezes up.

It’s not exactly a hard sell. The loner thing, not being able to make friends, having trust issues. So if they’ve figured it out what’s the point of telling them? To just solidify it. 

Instead of clarifying or simply saying something like, “my home life sucked ass.” He did something stupider and ran.

But isn’t that all Keith knows? Fighting and running.

  
  


An hour or so later he’s still awake, despite trying to be asleep. He just can’t seem to relax. His heart is still pounding, not that loudly or hard, but it still feels like his heart is trying to escape out of his ribcage.

Then there’s a knock on the door.

Keith sat up.

“Keith? Are you awake?” That’s Lance, which is… new. “If you are, can I come in?”

“Sure,” Keith said, flinging the blanket off of himself as the door opened. 

The first thing Lance did was look around. “Your room is so… empty.” Keith doesn’t even bother looking around to see why Lance thinks that. He knows the room was empty, the only personal items he had were:

His dagger, the gloves, his clothes (duh) and a photo. The photo is of Adam, Shiro and himself. They’re smiling at the camera like complete dorks, unaware of the mess and chaos that was going to be sprung on them soon.

It’s everything personal he owns. Which is suiting enough.

“How’s your head?” Lance asked, unsure. “I’m sitting down next to you.”

“I’m not a child, you don’t need to announce every single move you make.”

“I’d rather warn you too much than not enough,” he sat down next to Keith. “Are you okay man?”

“Yup.”

“Okay, now I am not an expert in being okay. But I’m pretty sure okay people don’t do anything you did an hour ago.”

Which is a fair point, which Keith didn't have an argument to.

“But I meant what I said before, I’m here if you need me. You could talk to anyone else, but I dunno, I’d rather talk to you if I were in your shoes. Because you’re my age and I love Shiro but he’s old and has forgotten what it’s like to be an angsty teenager.”

Keith smiled at that, not a huge smile. Just a small one, that he couldn’t help, he couldn’t suppress the damn thing before his face went. “SMILE TIME!” He shook his head like he was disappointed in Lance, but both of them knew that wasn’t true. 

Not even a little bit.

Deep, deep, down Keith, knew he had to tell someone. He looked at Lance, taking a deep breath. Letting himself sift through his thoughts, trying to figure out what to say. “Just give me a moment.”

Lance just nodded, not saying anything and sitting by his side. Keith can feel the heat radiating off of him, they’re not even that close. Pidge could probably fill the gap between them if she tried. There’s a gap, it’s somehow so close, but not close enough. 

_Move closer!_ That’s the part of his brain that sounds like Adam, the kind and caring and normally more logical side.

_No, you fool!_ The other part cackles, _If you’re gonna release your tragic backstory there can be space between you two._ That part sounded like the worst mix of all of his foster-parents. Somehow that side wins out.

Keith stayed where he was. Looking down at his knees. “Uh… so I’m an orphan. Not a big shock. I was in foster care for a long time. For about six years I think? And I got bounced around a lot, and some of them sucked.”

He started tapping his foot on the ground, as again, he gave himself a moment to get his thoughts together. “Some of them would hit me, and badly too. One family would lock me in a cupboard if I acted out. Normally I would be violent and get sent away,” Keith sighed, letting his shoulders sink. “So I kinda have abandonment issues and I have nightmares and I get jumpy a lot.”

There. He’d said it, and he let his shoulders drop. Sure he hadn’t gone into excruciating detail about what was what, but he didn’t need to or want to. So he didn’t have to. Boundaries. Keith looked up and gave Lance a small, but forced smile.

Lance’s expression was hard to read like he was still processing what Keith was saying. Then it clicked and his face fell, his eyes becoming sad and his mouth pressing into a thin line.

Then he put a hand on Keith’s shoulder and Keith was more than fine with this contact. Before Lance pulled Keith towards him and wrapped both arms around his shoulders. Holding him close. And Keith is willing to ignore the way his face feels like it’s on fire because he’s being hugged.

With a cough, Lance let go, not completely. His hands were still curled around Keith’s shoulders. “I’m sorry.”

“Huh?”

“You deserve better than that.”

And Keith was going to explode. Right now, and his guts are going to go everywhere and someone’s going to have to clean that up. “Thanks.”

Lance laughed, shaking his head as he stood up. “You’re ridiculous Kogane.” But his voice is so fond that Keith doesn’t even bother to take that to heart. “Crazy, batshit.”

“Fuck off dickhead,” Keith laughed and the smile on his face said he didn’t mean it.

* * *

In his defence. Keith didn’t mean to punch the King of whatever planet they were on. But Shiro and Allura didn’t think that was a good enough defence, so now while everyone else sorted out the mess that Keith made. He had to clean pods.

It wasn’t his favourite job, it wasn’t even in the top three. But it wasn’t the worst thing he could be doing, that would probably be taking notes of what was working and what wasn’t. Considering he wasn’t doing that Shiro wasn’t _that_ mad at him and considering Allura hadn’t persuaded Shiro into making him do that job, Allura wasn’t _that_ mad either.

They were still fairly mad. But they didn’t yell. 

With a slight grumble, Keith dipped the sponge back into the soapy water before scrubbing the inside of the pod. He was imagining that the sponge was a knife and the inside of the pod was the King’s stupid ugly head with three eyes.

So Keith wasn’t coping well. So. What?

“Stupid three-eyes with his ugly crown. Does he call that a crown? Ha!” He mumbled to himself. He can’t pinpoint the time he started talking to himself, it was probably sometime during the year alone in the desert. Mumbling to fill the space that surrounded himself. 

Privately he found it funny, that he’d be quiet when others were around and as soon as he was alone he was mumbling to himself like he was mad. “I should’ve hit him with my fuckin’ sword.”

His accent came through on that one, Southern as sweet tea. Laughing to himself he scrubbed the inside of the pod harder. Realising he probably sounded insane and if someone walked in right now he’d die.

“He’s ugly anyway,” Keith finished. Nodding to himself. “Like a baby, before it’s born, he looks like a fuckin’ raisin.” He threw the sponge into the bucket and moved onto the next pod, it opened for him and he started scrubbing again.

This time he let the silence surround him, as he scrubbed the inside of the pod. Not saying anything, or thinking much.

_Woosh._ Then it went dark.

The only light came from the window of the pod.

"No. No, no, no!" Keith slammed a hand against the door of the pod. "Don't. Please—" his voice cracked.

He was locked in a pod. Of course, he was, the others weren't going to be back for over a day. Was he going to die here?

The space was so small and dark and there was no air. It was like that damn cupboard again.

"Oh God," Keith muttered, leaning his forehead against the door of the pod.

Too small. Too dark. Too familiar.

Familiar enough to squeeze the breath out of him, as his heart started racing and his head dizzily light. Black dots danced in his vision and the floor threatened to drop Keith.

A sob escaped his lips before he could stop it. A sound that came from the back of his throat. He slammed his fists against the window of the pod. Again, and again.

Tears rolled steadily down his cheeks as he started kicking the door between punches which shot pain up his arms.

With a cry, he slammed his heel into the door of the pod, which did nothing apart from hurt his foot. A shooting aching pain which caused a scream to escape from his lips.

_Keith. You need to stay calm._ The kind part of his brain whispered at him. _Panicking won't do anything._

He was allowed to panic a little. The pods didn't have ventilation, he'd die from lack of oxygen. 

When were they coming back? Could Keith just wait it out?

_"Are you going to be alright by yourself for a day or so?"_ Lance had asked, while Shiro and Allura were discussing how to salvage the situation.

A day or so.

It had been a few hours top.

Oh, God. 

_Stay calm Kogane._

Keith racked his brain, for something, anything that would get him out of the situation. How to get this stupid pod to spit him out.

_"If the pod detects an injury, even if I haven't got it ready it'll start healing."_

Injury. He had to injure himself badly enough that the pod would automatically start and eventually spit him out.

With a shuddering breath, which threatened to turn into an ugly sob he placed his hand, so his nails were on his skin on his arm. He winced as he scratched down. Then realised a few scratches that didn't break the skin wouldn't do anything.

How was he supposed to break a bone? In an area which he could barely move in. 

God. It was dark. It was too dark.

_Calm. Stay calm or you'll die._

Then there was a flash, of when he was young. His foster-mother at the time, who had a kind face until she shoved him into a cupboard. She snarled at him and then there was the click of a lock.

Snapping out of it Keith slammed his hand on the door. "Help!" He called out, which was probably useless, but in case it wasn't he yelled.

His chest was constricting on him, squeezing his lungs until he was panting and spluttering for breath that wouldn't fill his lungs. No matter how much he heaved it wasn't enough air.

Again, his fist met the door. But it was weak, more of a tap then a hit. He hit his other fist again, weaker this time.

_I'm going to die. I'm going to die._

Leaning his head against the glass of the pod. Tears streaming down his cheeks as no noise came out of his mouth. Until he whimpered, in a way that made him sound ten and pathetic.

Then he laughed. A loud laugh that was as much a sob as a laugh, as tears slithered down his face.

There was a cruel irony to it all. That he'd survived almost impossible situations. Surrounded by Galra injured. Throwing himself down a cliff praying that Lance would catch him.

All of that to run out of air in a pod.

He laughed longer, and harder. Realising that it would be using his air, and he didn't know how much of that he had left. But if he was going to die, might as well use the last of his air laughing bitterly to himself.

Even if the laughs were turning more into sobs than laughs. 

He didn't know how long passed, with him laughing and crying before he couldn't breathe again. Whether because he was freaking out, or he'd just run out of air he didn't know.

Somehow he couldn't find it within himself to care either. 

_You can't die here._

He could. Watch him.

_Adam will be mad._

Probably.

_Shiro would be upset. The team would be upset._

Yeah. They would.

_You can't die here._

He couldn't die here.

With a gasp he looked up, a new surge of energy filling his body. His vision tinted slightly yellow.

He slammed his fist on the door and the metal dented. Again. The metal moved with him.

Throwing his weight forward, he hit the ground. The door falling off and landing underneath him as he smacked his nose against the metal. Causing a _clang_ to echo around the room.

"Oh thank God." Keith muttered, before lifting himself off of the ground. Feeling very tired, like he could nap for a thousand years.

* * *

Walking back into the castle, with a pod broken open with the door torn off its hinges wasn't what Lance expected to happen.

But it happened.

Everyone stayed silent for a long moment.

"Where's Keith?" Pidge asked quietly. Before, "Keith!"

Her voice echoed around but gave nothing else, no call back, no nothing. Just a silence that settled itself around them.

Red was still here. It meant… it didn't mean anything good.

"I'll check the cameras." Pidge said quickly and Hunk followed after her the short distance to the control panel.

Allura took a deep breath, glancing at Coran. "A human can't break the pod lid." She said, the weight of her words surrounded them. "It's likely he's been captured."

Lance walked towards the door, lifting it up so it was standing. All the indents were on what would be the interior. Someone had been trapped in there.

He gulped, looking back at the group. "They came from inside the pod."

Allura and Shiro glanced at each other, and then the bucket and then the sponge theat was inside the pod.

"Keith did this?" Shiro, sounded quite light-headed. And airy. 

"It is likely."

"People get stronger when they're scared," Lance supplied. "It wouldn't be that hard. If you kicked at the hinges."

Everyone stared at Lance. "If he weakened the hinges. Which looks like he did, then thrown his weight forward…"

"Guys…" Pidge started. "I found it."

Everyone rushed over. Lance found himself settled between Hunk and Allura.

The video started with Keith mumbling to himself. He couldn't make out what exactly he was saying. But he heard, "fuckin' raisin" and Allura snorted at that.

Keith slipped inside a pod, probably to clean it better? There was a defined _woosh_ and the door closed.

"He can't do small spaces." Shiro said, lowly. "Sometimes he'd get freaked out in the flight simulators."

They all stayed silent as they watched the video. Not a lot happened for a while, there was banging and a strained noise.

"Help!" Keith's voice echoed through the video and it was filled with so much desperation and fear that Lance cringed. Before spinning around.

Everyone glanced at him as he left. But no one tried to stop him, or even gave him a reason this was a bad idea.

His footsteps were strong as he went to the training deck. Echoing around the halls, confident and bold. They however, faltered as he stepped inside the training deck..

"End training sequence!" Keith's voice barked before Lance could see him. When he eventually looked at Keith he was sprawled out across the floor. Breathing heavily staring at the ceiling.

His knuckles were scabbed and bruised. Lance gave himself a moment, to just look at Keith before he had to get it together and start being a good friend.

Keith's bangs were flattened against his forehead, his skin glistened from sweat. Eyes wide, lips slightly parted as his chest heaved like he'd run a marathon. Wheezing almost, like his chest hadn’t quite recovered.

Lance looked a bit longer, at Keith's flushed cheeks and at where his shirt had ridden up a little. Revealing a slither of pale skin.

He was attractive. Lance knew that. It didn't mean he had feelings or anything. He could appreciate that Shiro was also attractive, that didn't mean anything. He acknowledged that Allura was attractive and that didn’t mean anything either.

"Keith?"

At that Keith sat up so fast that he must've got a concussion, or whiplash, or something.

"Oh." He got up off the floor. "You're back."

"Yeah."

"Did you salvage it?'

"Yup."

"Cool."

"Look. Keith I've seen the pod, everyone has."

"I'm fine Lance." His bayard transformed and he hung it off his hand, like he wasn't quite bothered with it. "Just— can't do small spaces."

Lance took a few steps forward, confident and sure. "I'm going to hug you now. Speak now or forever hold your peace."

Keith stumbled forward, wrapping his arms around Lance before Lance could do the same to him.

It was awkward. Keith was standing on his tip-toes. As he buried his face into Lance's neck. 

They stayed like that for a long time. No words being spoken, because nothing else needed to be said.

And if they hugged until they heard footsteps coming to the training deck, they didn’t mention it. Keith let go three seconds before Pidge came bounding in. That was that.

Neither of them mentioned it.

* * *

The thing was that Keith rarely made friends. It was just something Keith came to accept a long time ago. But was recently challenged with five new people in his life who were as determined to befriend him as Shiro and Adam were.

Now he had more friends than he knew what to do with. At once he had more friends than he'd have over the entire course of his life. And the warm snug feeling in his chest told him this, that he was safe.

Pidge, who he’d play video games with or just sit as she did something sciency, chattering to fill the silence and Keith would respond in short phrases and little laughs. Neither of them minded the silence, and Pidge didn’t mind how she had to carry most of the conversation.

Allura, who whenever they had a break would sit down together and talk, about everything and nothing. The colour of the sky on Earth, the shared pain of their dead fathers, the shared pain of not knowing when the fight would finally stop.

Cooking with Hunk, laughing at stupid jokes that didn’t make sense as Hunk basically forced him to taste test saying, “I’ve seen more meat on a twig than you.” So Keith obliged, sometimes eating the best things he’d ever tasted. Sometimes having to throw up because the taste was so bad.

Training with Lance, sparring, mostly. Or Lance chattering endlessly and Keith holding onto every word like it was a prayer. Lance didn’t think he was listening. But he was, he listened to every word as Lance wove a story together in a way that seemed more like a writer or a skilled public speaker rather than a loud-mouthed kid who could funnily enough do gymnastics.

(When he witnessed Lance walking on his hands like it was nothing he screamed a lot. Which ended up making Lance laugh so hard that he actually cried.)

His favourite moments were with the whole team. Whether the bonding exercises which Allura knew they didn’t have to do anymore. Or just the movie nights, everyone crowded in front of the TV. Watching trash Atlean movies.

Pidge had a photo. Which Keith had gotten a copy of, and now it was in his bedroom, next to the photo of Shiro and Adam. It was all of them, sitting on the couch. Everyone apart from Pidge was in the shot.

They’d been watching a horror movie. Coran was mid-scream, his mouth wide and hands up in the air. Hunk was peeking out behind his fingers, which were mostly covering his eyes. Lance was a blur, he fell out off the couch, but he was a blur of blue and brown skin. Shiro’s hands were clamped to either side of his own face, as his eyes were comically large. Allura was clinging onto Keith’s shoulder as she yelled.

Keith was sitting there, arms crossed, smiling a little. Almost fondly at the blur which was Lance.

This was home.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Just a few things I headcannon, maybe for later. But they're canon here, because no one can control me. What are they? My Dad?
> 
> 1\. Keith and Adam totally had/have a "I pretend to hate you for the drama" relationship, but I know that they love each other and would die and kill for each other. While Adam and Keith probably aren't as close as Shiro and Keith I like to think they're pretty close.
> 
> 2\. Keith lived on the streets for a year! It was mentioned in my last fic. Think about it. Keith has a tendency to run away (in canon and everything) and I think the streets things makes sense for his character. He ran and Shiro found him.
> 
> 3\. Pidge probably knows that Keith isn't fully human at this point, and Keith is pretty sure he ain't human either. At this point anyway because weird things keep happening. (Also Pidge did see Keith go all purple when he broke out of the pod but told everyone that it was just a colour disfiguration because the castle is old AF) This gets explored slightly more in Part 4 and will be explored more.
> 
> 4\. He's Southern, and when he has too many emotions or gets too worked up he turns into a cowboy basically. I like to imagine that Pidge watched him talking to himself all Southern and cried-laughed. So yes, he says y'all, y'ain't and mah.
> 
> 5\. ADAM WON'T BE DEAD, BECAUSE SCREW CANON AND THEY DESERVE TO BE HAPPY! ALSO WHY DIDN'T KEITH HAVE ANY RELATIONSHIP WITH ADAM IN CANON? BECAUSE FUCK THAAAAT.
> 
> 6\. Keith can flirt, which is something that you shall discover later. He can flirt and when he lived on the streets he used to flirt with other kids around his age to get what he wants and when he was in the shack. (He can't flirt with Lance tho, real feelings are involved and that's very not cool.)
> 
> 7\. I'M NOT DOING THE CLONE ARC, STORYLINE, WHATEVER! I have a better idea for that which doesn't involve cloning because... cloning. But it'll be just as tense don't even worry. And just as angsty.


End file.
